"An injury to one's sense of self forges some bonds. The self-injury
becomes part of the fabric of the relationship and further disrupts the
natural unfolding of the self. When this involves terror of any sort,
an emptiness forms at the core of the person and the self becomes
inconsolable. No addiction can fill it. Not denial of self will
restore it. No single gesture will be believable. Only a profound sens
of the human community caring for the self can seal up this hole. We
call this wound shame.
"This part of your recovery agenda
looks at how the relationship forced you to devalue the self, and plans
for self-restoration to the human community. Start by making a list of
how the relationship devalued you. Think of times you felt unworthy,
embarrassed, flawed or ashamed. Make a list of ten sources of shame in
the relationship." - Patrick J. Carnes, Ph.D. in Betrayal Bond
Shame recovery is hard. We get used to hurting ourselves then get into relationships that are harmful.
www.The-wind-project.com
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